The Bogan Mentality:


Now in fairness, before this rant takes off, I must concede that the bogan mentality extends beyond people with tattoo’s, and souped up HSV’s with ‘fuck off we’re full stickers on them’ – though usually these are both prerequisites to be initiated into such an illustrious group of fuckwits.

The bogan mentality was on display when those juveniles cloked valiantly in Australian flags rioted in Cronulla in a deluded display of patriotism, the bogan mentality was on display at that Cultural Wasteland pub you frequent where in a rare display of collective creativity everybody had southern cross /Australian made tattoo’s. The bogan mentality was on display when the same people with the abovementioned tattoo’s could not identify the Southern Cross, and their knowledge of Australian geography was limited to the idea that we are being invaded by ‘boat people’.

The bogan mentality was on display at the last festival you went too. They were the people who after taking four flippers were enlightened and inspired to the extent that in another transcendent collective realisation they all took their bintang singlets off, tucked them into their board shorts, ever so cleverly jumped into your photos, and then decided to look for fights against anyone who managed to keep their shirts on/shit together – because why would you do that?

The bogan mentality was on display on your last overseas trip, they were the one’s who were perplexed by the existence of other ethnicities, and people who did not frequently pollute their sentences with copious amounts of ‘ayes’, ‘cunts’ or other expletives.

The bogan mentality was on display after 8 seasons of Big Brother and far too many seasons of Australian Idle.

The bogan mentality was on display from St Kilda to Kings Cross, on your television, at your supermarket, at your university, in your workplace, at your pub, in your dreams, nightmares and pretty much anywhere other than your local library, as enlightement is the bogan’s kryptonite.

The bogan mentality – it’s not a class thing, it’s a taste thing.

And as this wave of neo-philistinism marches towards an unwavering crescendo, all that is left to do is add the bogan mentality to the comprehensive list of things that are shit!

MDG

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